Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Guilt-tripped

Back in the day when I was an acting student at BYU we were taught to use tactics to achieve or goal or objective. One of the popular tactic choices of use was "to guiltify" which is obviously not a real word. But we used it as an easy way to say "to guilt trip" someone.
Well, today, I had an experience with this woman who was almost a pro at it. I went to Ikea to do some Christmas shopping but first I needed to return something. I saw the huge line and could tell people had been waiting a long time and were growing impatient. Well, I went to take my number and had found some extras laying on top of the little machine that people had either left because they didn't want to wait anymore or some kid pulled too many out and they were placed on top. Well, the number I chose was 14 before the one next out of the machine, and about 5 numbers away from the next in line. So, obviously I took the one from on top, #600. For a second, I thought to myself, "I should give this to a person already in line." But I dismissed that thought because I didn't know what numbers everyone else had anyway. There were people in line and scattered among benches so I would have had to ask everybody what their number was which was which would have been dumb. So I kept my number and took my place on a bench in line to wait. It did take a while. Well, when I was about 2 numbers away from my number being called and this lady, we'll call her lady #1, turned to me and asked, out of curiosity, what my number was. I told her "600" and she looked at hers and hers was "608". She then looked at me strangely and asked "How did you get a number before ours? Weren't you in line after us?" I said, "Well, perhaps." And then she asked, "Well, how did you get it?" I told her, "I found it on top of the machine." and then another, nicer lady in line said, "someone probably left it on top because they didn't want to wait." Then lady #1 asked, "So you haven't been waiting as long as the rest of us?" and started asking everyone else what their number was. And then she looked at me, not knowing exactly what to say next but without any tact whatsoever. She came up with this, accompanied by another very nasty glare, like worse than any of my glares, "Would you actually feel good about going ahead of us?" WHAT THE HECK!?!?!? Did she just say that? Oh, that made me mad (and sort of embarrassed for her and me at the same time). So, I said, "Well, yes. Who would I choose to give it to?" and trying to avoid any contention but wanting to keep my number in line. I was thinking about giving it to the nicer lady with a child, but honestly, would that be fair to everyone else? And do I need to be fair? And honestly I thought I deserve to keep my number because I was smart enough to look at the ones on top and realized they would come up quicker than 614! Wow! When my number was called about a minute later I could feel her eyes burning into my back. Just glaring at me thinking I was such an uncompassionate person for not giving her my number 600!!!!! I got over it quickly but was afraid I would have to confront her in the monstrous Ikea and that I would be trapped there to face her amongst the piles of rag rugs and handmade baskets. Ugh. Well, I don't feel guilty now. I think I handled the situation quite well. I only hope she got over it.

4 comments:

  1. Hey Hannah, it's Rachael. I noticed a couple of Hannah's on Melissa's blog, and figured one must be you. Would it be all right if I comment on your site once in a while?
    Sorry about your bad experience at Ikea. I hate when people are grumpy and pass judgment like that!

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  2. sure! Thanks Rachel! I noticed your blog too! It's fun to see!

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  3. Hannah,

    I stumbled accross your blog through Sarah Jane's blog. It's fun to see what you're up to. I couldn't help but think about my mask club when I saw your post. Boy, that was a long time ago! Hope you're doing well. You look great.

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  4. WHAT? Who on earth does that? I hope she ordered meatballs and found a big black hair in them. I'm surprised she didn't go tell on you. Lame.

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