Uncensored: No more "special" days

DISCLAIMER: I know that most of you have experienced this same predicament. It's meant to simply make you laugh and not get sympathy. This is not the first time I've experienced this nor the last. I don't want you to think I never go out with all 3 kids by myself, because I do. Doesn't mean I like to, because I'm sort of a wimp that way. I know that many of you already do or have lived in a big city and experience this often. Or have several children and experience this often, all over the globe, even in smaller towns. Or that you or your spouse has a job that requires them to be away from home a lot. I'm just feeling out our options for our future.

So I wanted to do something special with the kids tonight. Tyler would be gone literally all day. We saw him for 30 minutes this morning and 10 minutes this early evening. The kids were well behaved today, dinner was on time. They ate it all up with little complaint. They cleaned up their toys quickly. I wanted to treat them at the BYU Creamery.

Tyler has been gone a lot this semester. They say that the first year of law school is the hardest, the second is the busiest and the third is just boring. Well, so far it's been true. Tyler is involved in editing for two journals this year, one being the Law Review. He's also always involved in an intramural sport, currently basketball. He commutes to intern for a judge up in SLC every Friday. Plus he's a TA for two classes, one in the Law school and one with his old prof over in Philosophy. Basically, he's busy and it's giving me a taste of what it'll be like when he's a "real lawyer." He keeps reminding me that I've been spoiled thus far in our marriage, and I have! Being a student wife certainly has it's perks. But this semester has been exhausting!

We've been toying around with the idea of having him fly out to NYC and DC in August for the annual job fair interviews. See if he has a shot at getting a job offer back east. We've juggled the pro's and con's. Is it worth it? Moving away from family? Working crazy hours and a stressful job at a big firm? How adventurous (in a good way) can it be to travel and live in a big city with 3 kids? How temporary can we make it? How will moving so much affect the children? Etc, etc....

So after reading several friends blogs about their experience living in New York City with kids, I wanted to test the waters. See how I could manage on my own while Tyler works long hours. So we went to the Creamery. Big whoop, right? It's an ice cream parlor/corner market. It's not big. There aren't scary mean people that shop there. It's mostly full of students, families or couple's returning from the Temple up the street. But it was crowded. The prices are high but the quality is good. "Easy peasy, lemon squeezy," as Samuel quotes almost daily. Right? Wrong.

Samuel wanted green ice cream and Jocelyn wanted pink. Cecily just wanted anything with sugar. And I wanted to save money. So I ordered a large hot fudge sunday because it came with two scoops, whipped cream and a cherry on top! Sounds perfect, right? Well, apparently I got it all wrong. Jocelyn was disappointed because I ordered her pink peppermint ice cream instead of the pink "sparkle" stuff that tasted like children's cough syrup. Then Samuel informed me that I had it all wrong because his was not in a cone. And he didn't want that kind of whipped cream??? And Cecily just squaked until she got enough sugar in her system to give her a headache! And I ended up eating most of it because I hate wasting, especially expensive food.

So as it started melting I scooped it up into a cup to salvage and freeze it for later. I had to prevent Samuel from steeling the cups for the fountain drinks and repeated that I did not "buy a drink" that we were only allowed water. Then we marched over to grab a gallon of milk. I was holding the 20 pound baby in a puffy coat in one arm, slipped the credit card in the reverse pocket. Joc and Sammy each had their own styrophom cup of water and I was holding the ice cream in my other hand. I informed Samuel that he needed to give his cup of water to Jocelyn and grab a blue gallon of milk. Mind you, he's only 6, and skinny, so this gallon was quite a burden for him to carry. We walk up to the counter, pay for the milk. Jocelyn starts swinging on the railing. Samuel informs me that he needs to find his coat and leaves. I wait at the check out, impatiently for him to return. But he does not. Still no sign of him. I keep waiting, huffing and puffing, trying to figure out how to carry 2 cups of water, 1 gallon of milk, 1 cup of ice cream and one 20 pound puffy baby. All the while, the two female student cashiers just gawk at me, mouths hanging open like they've never seen a mother in distress. lol. They don't offer to help in any way. Not to find my son. Not to hold my milk. Nothing. So I grow more impatient and grab everything, and head to the table only to find Samuel's coat but no Samuel. I decide to throw the water and ice cream away.Oh, well, it was melting anyway. Instruct J to grab S's coat and we hunt for S. It takes 1 full circle around the store before I spot him and yell at him, down the aisle, scaring more students with my glares, that we need to go, now. Or my arm will fall off. He had to pee but I told him it had to wait until we got home. By this point I am so frustrated people start moving out of my way because they see me bulldozing through the store. My face says it all. I immediatley start lecturing them both about how ungrateful they are for complaining. About why I never take them to do "special" things because this is the way they behave. That they are not obedient and need to stick next to my side, especially in crowded places. Then I thumped Samuel on the head for laughing and complaining some more. I lectured them some more when I put them to bed and tried to teach them about gratitude. Not sure if it sunk in. J still thinks that I don't deserve Christmas presents from Santa Claus because I am " a bad mom." Gee, thanks.

I was so done! I failed my own test! I don't know if I COULD handle the city life. More crowds, more glares, more "special" places to go unappreciated. But what could I learn from that experience? What could it force me to learn about patience????.....do I want to find out?

So anyway, thanks for letting me vent. It's kind of funny, in retrospect. I'm over-stuffed with ice cream that I didn't really want to eat. It throws off all my calorie counting! And tomorrow I don't anticipate the question that I hear every stinking day, "What are we doing special today, mommy?"